Jeff was born in 1978, just in time to catch the premier of Superman in its original glory. His first several years were bleak from a comedic point-of-view; indeed, he said almost nothing funny until he was nine years old, when he finally entered the world of comedy with an evocative and poignant recitation of the time-honored phrase, "I know you are...but what am I?"

He began writing at the age of thirteen, and completed his first novel (a fantasy) in only three short months. A miraculous rate of creation, you might think, until you realize that it was a terrible book that its author will never let anybody read. However, fifteen years of practice and perseverance has improved Jeff's writing considerably. His first novel, Reality, was published by Academy Chicago Publishers to critical acclaim in 2006. He has written five other novels, two satirical 'self-help' books (including Nine Easy Ways to Uncrapify Your Life!), one book of poetry, a children's play, and dozens of short stories. Jeff is confident that some of them will eventually be published, and others will die in obscurity where they belong.

In 2000, Jeff graduated from Vanderbilt University with degrees in English and Secondary Education, and taught high school for two years. They were two long years, very long indeed, but they were invaluable preparation for his eventual transition into comedy. Because frankly, the worst comedy audiences in the world aren't half as bad as a classroom full of bored, hormonally-imbalanced teenagers. Thanks to that experience, Jeff is happy to perform for anyone, confident that none of his college or corporate audiences will throw things at him.

Now, Jeff has been a full-time comedian and professional speaker for several years. He's performed for audiences in over 30 states and parts of Canada, and so far he hasn't been banned from returning to any of them. What's next for Jeff? Perhaps a run at the presidency, although he'll have to wait until he's 35. But for now, Jeff is happy where he is.

• Uncrapify Your Life! - Tired of dull, uninspiring motivational speakers? Then look no further. Professional comedian and world-renowned super-guru Jeff Havens presents Uncrapify Your Life!, a satirical offering that provides all the wrong advice in a hilarious, tongue-in-cheek fashion. The Uncrapify Your Life! program will teach you and your business associates how to become a better communicator by more effectively criticizing others, and how to handle responsibility by outsourcing blame. Complete with acronyms, audience participation, and a dynamic Powerpoint presentation, Uncrapify Your Life! is a great way to provide a message to your business or corporation in a fun, interesting, novel fashion.